The 37 most absurd lines from Donald Trump’s Labor Day ‘news conference’



I went via his remarks and pulled out the lines you must see. They’re beneath.

1. “Happy Labors — Labor Day.”

2. “As you probably see, the numbers are terrific. So we called some people, wished them a very happy Labor Day. And they told us how they’re doing.”

What numbers? What folks? How are they doing?

3. “The unemployment rate plunged, really to the surprise of many, all the way down to 8 — 8.4% in August. And that’s the second-largest single-month decline on record. And we have the first; we have both of them. So we have the two number one declines. Decline meaning positive, not negative.”

It is true that the unemployment rate dropped to 8.4% in August. But the rationale we have now had such huge drops within the unemployment price is that it soared to over 14% throughout late spring as a result of coronavirus shutdown. You can solely have such huge drops when you’ve got huge will increase too. Also, “decline meaning positive.” Or put one other means: “Not ‘bad’ meaning ‘bad’ but ‘bad’ meaning ‘good.'”

4. “We have a V shape; it’s probably a super V.”

Trump is speaking concerning the form of the financial restoration. A “V”-shaped recovery is one the place issues collapse rapidly and get better rapidly. A “Super V” restoration is, um, not a factor. (Joe Biden has mentioned this can be a K-shaped recovery.)

5. “Under Operation Warp Speed, we’ve pioneered groundbreaking therapies, reducing the fatality rate 85% since April.”

What’s actually modified since April is that we have now recognized heaps extra individuals who have the virus which, as this article in Psychiatric Times notes, has “increased the size of the denominator, while the numerator has remained relatively unchanged.” Meaning, the variety of folks dying just isn’t all that totally different. We are merely higher in a position to ID who has gentle or asymptomatic circumstances much better.

6. “This could’ve taken two or three years, and instead it’s going to be — going to be done in a very short period of time; could even have it during the month of October.”

Trump is floating the concept of a vaccine being prepared “during the month of October.” Put a pin on this. We’ll come again to it later.

7. “Joe Biden, the radical socialist Democrats would immediately collapse the economy. If they got in, they would collapse it. You’ll have a crash the likes of which you’ve never seen before.”

Overstatement, thy title is Donald Trump.

8. “Biden’s also pledged to demolish the US energy industry and implement the same policies causing blackouts in California. He wants to have things lit up with wind.”

“He wants to have things lit up with wind.” — The President of the United States

9. “So we’re setting records in jobs, we’re setting records in numbers. And you’re going to see some very big numbers.”

So you say we’re setting data in “numbers,” eh? Tell me extra…

10. “Biden wants to surrender our country to the virus, he wants to surrender our families to the violent left-wing mob, and he wants to surrender our jobs to China — our jobs and our economic well-being.”

He does? How have I not heard about this earlier than????

11. “Our farmers wouldn’t be existent right now. Right now, they’re very happy.”

“Why US farmers are falling out of love with Donald Trump.” — Financial Times

12. “We’re way ahead on the nuclear front. We’ve upgraded our nuclear.”

Everyone is aware of upgraded nuclear is the perfect type of nuclear.

13. “When reports come out that certain countries don’t really like me too much, that’s not because of my personality, although it could be that also, frankly.”

[nods head slowly]

14. “And Biden doesn’t have a clue. He — you know he doesn’t have a clue. Everybody knows he doesn’t have a clue. In prime time, he wasn’t good, and now it’s not prime time.”

Wait, this isn’t “prime time?” When was “prime time?” Did I one way or the other miss it and never even know?

15. “His son, Where’s Hunter? — Where’s Hunter? I call him ‘Where’s Hunter?’ — walked away with one and a half billion dollars to manage, even though he never did that before.”

“I call him ‘Where’s Hunter’?” — The President of the United States. Also, this declare about how a lot cash Hunter Biden made in China is false.

16. “‘I won’t give them the billion dollars,’ he says. ‘I won’t give them unless they get rid of that prosecutor,’ and then, voila, they got rid of the prosecutor. And the press doesn’t even want to talk about it.”

The press has investigated this declare in regard to Joe Biden’s position in Ukraine. And nothing Trump is saying here is accurate.

17. “I’m not saying the military is in love with me. The soldiers are. The top people in the Pentagon probably aren’t because they want to do nothing but fight wars so that all of those wonderful companies that make the bombs and make the planes and make everything else stay happy.”

Holy crap. This is the President suggesting that the leaders of the US army do not like him as a result of he is trying to break up their war machine. Very regular stuff!

18. “We defeated 100% of the ISIS caliphate. 100%. When I was in, when I came in it was a mess. It was all over. They have it in a certain color, all ISIS. A year later I said, ‘Where is it?’ ‘It’s all gone, sir, because of you.’ It’s all gone because of my philosophy.”

In which Donald Trump say he personally defeated ISIS. (Also, this is not true.)

19. “I talk about it cause today’s Labor Day. It’s a good time to talk about when we’re being ripped off by countries, but nobody’s even close to China.”

Proposed new Labor Day slogan: “A day to remember how we are being ripped off by other countries.” That may catch on!

20. “And Biden’s a stupid person. You know that. You’re not going to write it. You know that.”

OK, so, reporters ought to simply write the phrases “Biden is a stupid person?” Like, that does not really feel like what journalists do?

21. “If Biden wins, China wins, because China will own this country.”

Again, how did I not learn about this? Seems related!

22. “You’re going to have to take that off, please. Just — you can take it off. You’re — you’re — how — how many feet are you away? Well, if you don’t take it off, you’re very muffled. So if you would take it off it would be a lot easier … “

In which Donald Trump tells a reporter (Jeff Mason of Reuters) to take off his masks whereas asking a query. Sure! Nothing to see right here!

23. “John McCain liked wars. I will be a better warrior than anybody, but when we fight a war, we’re going to win them.”

Worth noting: John McCain was imprisoned for 5 years in a North Vietnamese jail camp after he was shot down. Donald Trump obtained five deferments to keep him out of the Vietnam War.

24. “But I wasn’t a fan, but I respect people and I respect a lot of people.”

So, Trump wasn’t a McCain fan. But he respects folks. In reality, he respects ‘”a lot” of individuals.

25. “Who would say a thing like that? Only an animal would say a thing like that. There’s nobody that has more respect for not only our military, but the people that gave their lives in the military — there’s nobody — and I think John Kelly knows that. I think he would know that, I think he knows that from me.”

26. ” I understand helicopters very well.”

Uh huh.

27. “I’ve done very well with deals, OK? That’s what I do.”

“Has Trump declared bankruptcy four or six times?” — Washington Post

28. “They spied on my campaign, and if they were Democrats, they would have been in jail two years ago. They would have been in jail — literally, if this side were the Democrats, they would have been in jail two years ago for 50-year terms for treason and other things.”

29. “They spied on my campaign, and that includes Biden and Obama. They spied on my campaign trying to defeat me.”

30. “But let me just — let me just tell you something: President Obama and Biden — Sleepy Joe — he knew everything that was happening. They were spying on my campaign, and they got caught. Now let’s see what happens.”

31. “And the dirtiest fight of all is the issuance of 80 million ballots, unrequested. They’re not requested. They’re just sending 80 million ballots all over the country — 80 million, non-requested. I call them unsolicited ballots. That’s going to be the dirtiest fight of all.”

Estimates are that 80 million people may vote by mail this year amid Covid-19 concerns. But that is not what Trump is saying right here. He is saying that “they” are sending 80 million “non-requested” ballots to folks. I do not know the place he received that quantity however one factor to clarify: What’s being despatched is mail-in poll purposes, not mail-in ballots. If somebody fills out the appliance, a mail-in poll is just despatched if their info matches what it on file with the elections division of their state.

32. “And if you look at the last period of six months, take a look at the races where they’ve sent ballots out, take a look at Carolyn Maloney, whose race should be redone because she won that race totally unfairly to her opponent.”

Simply not true. The vote counting in Maloney’s district took far too lengthy, sure. But no one alleged wrongdoing in the count.

33. “They’ve been looking at me for four years. They found nothing. Four years, think of it. For four years. From the day I came down the escalator I’ve been under investigation by sleaze, and they found nothing. They found nothing. “

34. “So we’re going to have this — a vaccine very soon, maybe even before a very special date. You know what date I’m talking about.”

Trump, who has blasted Democrats for making the vaccine political, simply comes proper out and says he needs to have the vaccine earlier than election day. OK.

35. “But you have to look at [Kamala Harris] a little bit more closely, because obviously Joe’s not doing too well, so you’re going to have to look at her a little bit too closely.”

There’s zero proof that “Joe’s not doing well.”

36. “We have to have — if we get the vaccine early, that’s a great thing, whether it’s politics or not. Now, do benefits inure if you’re able to get something years ahead of schedule? I — I guess maybe they do. But the most important thing to me is saving lives. It’s the most important thing.”

He actually simply mentioned that the vaccine could be out there “before a very special date.” Like, am I on crazy pills here?

37. “I want to thank you all, and I just want to wish you a very happy Labor Day. And we’re having tremendous success, whether it’s on the vaccines, whether it’s on the pandemic — the — the plague that came in from China that China should’ve never let happen, cause I will never feel the same about China.”

Yeah, this appears like a superb place to finish.



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